Average Joe SCOTUS: Texas v. New Mexico

In a case which seems like a total waste of time and some petty bullshit between two states, at issue here is some water rights thing. This is a unique case that, because it’s an interstate issue, just falls under SCOTUS jurisdiction, as opposed to something they agree to hear.

The Pecos River travels through both Texas and New Mexico. Apparently, they signed a deal that New Mexico would make sure it didn’t take too much water from the river, which would them harm Texas if they didn’t get enough, since the river travels through New Mexico first, and into Texas.

In order to enforce this deal, they hired a River Master to manage this shit.

Anyway, in 2015, there was a big storm, and New Mexico had a reservoir in the Pecos Basin that feeds the Pecos River, and that shit filled up. So they were gonna let that water run down the river to Texas. But Texas was like, “hey buddy, pal, friend, chap…can you hold that water for us. Our reservoir is all kinds of fucked up, and it won’t hold shit.”

So New Mexico was like, “Sure, dawg. We’ll hold it.”

Well, they held that shit for nine months. During such time, a lot of it evaporated. So New Mexico was finally like, “We gotta dump this shit, bro” and so they did.

So the water headed to Texas, but was light, since a lot of it evaporated off. But New Mexico wanted credited for all the water that was evaporated and sent to Texas, since it evaporated while being held for Texas.

Since the contract didn’t account for this shit, they asked the River Master dude to settle this shit, and he was basically like, “Fuck it, I’m calling these losses as Texas’, since they asked NM to hold that shit.”

The U.S. Attorney General sided with New Mexico saying in an amicus brief, “Saying listen you longhorn fucks, if you had taken the water when it was ready for you, all those evaporative losses would have been yours. And it’s not like New Mexico has some way of preventing water from evaporating in a reservoir. So fuck you, this is on you.”

But Texas was like, “Dude, you can’t just make up rules willy-nilly. So let’s have SCOTUS sort it out, since they have nothing better to do.

In a unanimous decision where Justice Barrett abstained, SCOTUS sided with New Mexico, Texas has no standing to review the Pecos River Master’s determination.

Hear oral arguments and read about the case here


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